Fathers and Daughters

I finished up my meeting for work yesterday and this message from Joe appeard in my in-box. I was lauhing so hard reading and wanted to share. As you know I was in AZ for work all week...


Jessica,

I wish you were here. Selena has an itchy Pee Pee. She was talking about it yesterday eveneing and then came and woke me up in the middle of the night saying that she couldn't sleep cuz it itches so bad.....

Here is where my commical problem arises....

WTF am I supposed to do about it??? I have NO clue about how to safely operate that type of equipment. So what did I do you ask?

I told her to go back to her room. I layed there for a minute trying to wake up enough to develop some type of plan. Stumbled into the bathroom to look at itch lotions - jock itch, probably not. Cortizone? Doubt it. Other prescription itch cream for Lyme disease. Definately not. Could kill her I bet.

Gold bond medicated lotion? I dunno. sounds okay to me.

Enter Selena's room. "here sweety, take a dab of this and rub it on the OUTSIDE of your Pee Pee." It is for external use only.

"no daddy, I want you to do it." Oh brother. Where the hell is the mom?????

So, I turn on the light, there I am at 12:09am rubbing lotion on her Pee Pee. I was careful to apply lotion externally and told her not to touch or scratch.

Then tried to fall back asleep semi-successfully after being fully awake and scared that I am not certified to be doing these types of procedures. try to sleep until my important 7am board presentation. I feared I would hear screaming about a burning sensation or something, or that the itch is still present because it is an internal itch.

faded to sleep remembering some ol commercial on tv that asked "Feminine itching getting you down?" Wish I could recall what that product was.............

Should I be concerned? schedule an appointment with someone? Home remedies? IS this normal? Like, how many in 100 get this would you say?

I have a weiner because God didn't want me messing with this type of stuff.

Truly yours,
Joe